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Ask Rene: Our Son Wants Us To Meet His Girlfriend, But She’s MARRIED!

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Ask Rene:
Our Son Wants Us To Meet His Girlfriend,
But She’s MARRIED!

 

Dear Rene:

My 25-year-old son, Ricky, is in a relationship with a girl and is madly in love with her.

The problem is that she’s married and carrying on behind her husband’s back.

My son didn’t want to tell me about their relationship but his younger sister, who he confided in, thought I had a right to know.

Now that I know, my son wants to bring his ‘girlfriend’ over for dinner to meet my husband and me, but I feel strange about the whole thing.

Should we meet this girl – or give her the cold shoulder? And what should we say to our son? What happens if this relationship goes the distance and we become the enemy because we weren’t welcoming enough?

Would love your advice Rene!

Thanks!

Patricia, St Charles

 


Hi Patricia:

Glad you wrote. You’ve made it pretty clear to us how you feel about Ricky carrying on with a married woman; have you done the same with him? The thing to remember here is that you do not have to do anything you don’t feel comfortable doing. So if this goes against your moral code, the answer is easy. No, don’t invite her over for dinner. Here’s what I recommend.

 

1. Make Your Position Clear To Your Son

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It’s not enough to tell him no without explaining why. Tell him you are uncomfortable with him seeing a married woman, and based on what you have said here, it doesn’t look like she’s leaving her husband anytime soon. So in other words, she’s comfortable cheating on her husband and your son is complacent with that. If that doesn’t sit well with you, tell him so.

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