Tales From A Twin Mom:
My Crazy Daily Thoughts
If you’ve followed me on GEM, you know I’m nowhere near being a perfect parent. I do what I can and at the end of the day I pat myself on the back for a job well done. I have four children, ranging in ages from twenty one to six and one thing holds true for all of them – not a day goes by where I don’t have these thoughts. I might be described as having a twisted sense of humor but I’m sure many of you can relate to at least one of these…
I want to run away. Really, I do. This thought crosses my mind several times a day. It could be in the middle of a toddler tantrum or during an argument with my oldest son, who by the way knows everything there is to know about life. I know I would return, but just in that split second where I see my ten year old roll her eyes at me for the first time I like to daydream about opening the door and leaving.
“Tiger stripes are something that you should wear proudly.”
If you’ve ever had this said to you by a drop dead gorgeous woman who still hasn’t had kids then you know what I mean.
Yes, I get it. I have four children and I am extremely proud of them but just once I would like to wear a bathing suit without having to strategically hide my tiger stripes. If I can’t have that, I would at least like to blurt the same thing out to you at the pool in the very near future so that you know what it feels like.
I’ve come to terms with the fact that having kids has made me acquire a certain taste for “mommy juice.” Motherhood is not easy and I need to take the edge off sometimes.
I have come to the realization that the following things make me extremely thirsty: sibling bickering, bad attitudes and unfinished to do lists (why do I even write them anymore?)
Listen, I had a vision of motherhood and this wasn’t it. I thought I would be able to handle it all. I thought those moms that I overheard complaining about their misbehaved children just weren’t creative enough. I would overhear them talk about how hard it was and I would smile because in my mind I was certain that I was going to be the perfect mother. Boy was I wrong. Instead I find myself doing things I never thought I would do like letting my kid eat the cookie that fell on the dirty floor because I know the meltdown that will take place if I don’t.
I became a mother very early in life and I still remember thinking this when I was pulled into the principal’s office because my six year old son (who was being taught English at the time) told his teacher that maybe she should learn Spanish instead of the other way around. True story. Fast forward to over fifteen years later and I’m still thinking it!
“No, Olivia- you can not tell the nice old man that said you were pretty that his breath smells.”
This thought is usually followed by my “Is it too early for wine?” thought.
“You know what I would do?”
No, I don’t and to be quite honest I don’t care. Unless you’ve been in my shoes and have experienced what it’s like to raise these particular children, please keep your parenting tips to yourself. I’m one hair away from losing my sanity so let’s please jump to the next topic – like why your five year old is chewing on his shoe.
Am I wrong to think that I’m not the only mother that has these thoughts on a daily basis? Please tell me I’m not alone and if I am, humor me and tell me everything will be alright.