Tales From A Twin Mom:
One On One Time With Your Multiples
Spending one on one time with your children is a privilege that parents of multiples must learn to master. Through my experience with other twin parents, it seems that many of these families spend their days and weeks essentially “teaming up” on the twins-using teamwork to get through the seemingly endless list of chores that comes with being in charge of two at a time. It’s true. Whether they’re infants, toddlers or school age, having twins means a larger diaper bag, an extra set of clothes to wash or pick out for tomorrow, and also an extra lunch to pack. Of course, we all know that twins NEVER eat the same thing to make things easier. (Why can’t they BOTH like salami and apple juice?) Does the lady at the deli counter think I order ¼ lb of meat at a time because I think it’s funny?
Quality time with a child will open the door to honest and revolutionary conversations, and it allows parents of multiples to see their children as individuals instead of parts of a set. Even though they have the same birthday and were roommates for 7-9 months before you even met them, that doesn’t take away from the fact that they are each different in their own way. Spending one on one time does not have to last all day. It can be something as short as 15 minutes if that is all your schedule allows. The main focus is for your child to have your undivided attention. Here are some examples of opportunities that you can use to have that special time.
2. Divide And Conquer
Have your partner take one twin out while you take the other. It can be as short as a visit to the new yogurt place, or as long as a shopping date. Walking around the mall and asking your child what they like will certainly help you bond. It will also give you the opportunity to more deeply explore the interests of that particular child. You may even hear something they just didn’t want to share around someone else their own age!