I’m Not Thrilled About My Daughter’s Fiancé
AND She Wants Me To Pay For The Wedding!
Here’s my question!
Our daughter Julia is all grown up now and doing splendidly. She’s a Harvard graduate, now working on Wall Street and really building a wonderful life for herself.
But Julia has zero self-confidence when it comes to guys and is constantly dating the wrong sort of men.
Her latest is a real piece of work. Al is divorced, unemployed and a recovering alcoholic in his mid-thirties (Julia is 24). But she’s crazy about him.
My husband and I have really tried to bite our tongues but just before Thanksgiving Julia announced that they were engaged! She knows we’re not happy but they want to get married next year AND want us to pay for the wedding (and they have big plans!)
So what do we do Rene? Should we pay for the big day when we don’t believe in the relationship? Should we demand they have a smaller wedding? Or should we leave them to fend for themselves…?
Calista in Rhode Island
While I do understand your concern, I think there are a couple of things worth pointing out that might help make this whole situation a bit clearer for you. What I see are two parts to this, your disapproval of Al as a partner for Julia and the fact that they want you to pay for their wedding.