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Ask Rene: Help! My Kid Doesn’t Want To Go To College!


Ask Rene:
Help! My Kid Doesn’t Want To Go To College!


Hi Rene,

Love the site and all your great pieces – keep ‘em coming!

Here’s my problem. My daughter Kara is about to turn 16 so we’re starting to think about her college education. We’ve saved a reasonable amount in her university fund and her grades would be good enough for her to have a strong choice of colleges to choose between.

Unfortunately Kara is adamant that she’s not going to college. She says she’s bored of school and doesn’t want to study anymore. She wants to have some fun after she graduates and go traveling.

Her father and I wouldn’t mind so much if she had a definite career plan in mind – but Kara basically just wants to party and we’re worried she’s throwing her future away.

How can we convince her daughter that she’s on the wrong track and making decisions that could seriously jeopardize her future?


Debbie, Colorado



Hi Debbie:

Okay, let’s start by backing away from the ledge. In your head you are imagining at best your daughter working for minimum wage in a sweatshop or at worst, living on the street. Neither one of those is likely to happen but if you keep pushing her, trying to bend her will to yours, the outcome will most assuredly not be what you want. Let’s look at the facts.


1. Kara's Age

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I have a daughter who’s just about a year younger than Kara and I can tell you their plans, life outlook, dreams, goals, who they want to marry, change as much as what they want to wear. They are experimenting in an effort to find out more about who they are and what they want. Think back to yourself at 16; did you have any idea about college, what you wanted to study and what you wanted to be when you grew up? I know I didn’t. In fact, I remember the prevailing thought for me at that time was how on earth could I be making decisions as a 16-year-old that would still be germane to my life 40 years from then? It’s friggin’ overwhelming!

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Combing the aisles at Target in search of the best deal on Cheerios, it hit Rene Syler like the stench of a dirty diaper on a hot summer’s day. Not only is perfection overrated its utterly impossible! Suddenly empowered, she figuratively donned her cape, scooped up another taco kit for dinner and Good Enough Mother was born.

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