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Tales From A Twin Mom: My 4, 2014 Parenting Regrets


Tales From A Twin Mom:

My 4, 2014 Parenting Regrets


In just a couple of weeks, we will all be saying goodbye to 2014; and just like you, I have my regrets. As a parent, I’m nowhere near being perfect-but I never pretend to be. I can write a mushy article about not saying ‘I love you’ enough, or wishing I had more time to cuddle with my children; but honestly, that just wouldn’t be me. What could possibly be my regrets? Take a seat and hear me out…

1. I regret listening to every single fool who had something to say about my parenting decisions. Some really got under my skin. I compared myself to other parents. I got angry at myself for not keeping my cool like others do. I wanted to be like them. I really did; but when I wasn’t, I was disappointed in myself. It’s very easy to talk the talk, but it’s another to walk the walk. That happened often this year, and I hope I can shrug these things off next year. Yes, I’m talking to you, person who told me they never yelled at their children.

Related: Our Story Begins: Stop Trying for Perfection!

2. I regret toning down my humor in an attempt to not offend others. I am who I am. If you can’t take the humor that comes with sitting next to me or holding a conversation with me, please move along. I shouldn’t have to censor myself for people that have a stick up their behinds. I enjoy laughing-even if it’s at myself. It’s what keeps me alive and happy. I want my children to be the same way. I want them to have the ability to tell and take a joke with ease. I want them to remember that their mother never changed in order to fit a mold; she went where she was accepted and understood. They need to remember my laughter. I mean really-when was the last time you remembered someone for their proper behavior and serious ways?

3. I regret raising my standards so high that there was no humanly way possible they could be reached. I can’t keep up with my kids’ messes, I can’t dust the house on a daily basis, and I can’t remember to get the clothes out of the dryer the same day-and that’s fine with me. It’s normal. I have a full time job and a family to care for. I have a dog that believes in taking a mud bath every month, and kids that enjoy tearing their rooms apart in order to find that one cheesy necklace that has the “diamond.” I have a car that is full of crumbs and french fries that never made it to my children’s mouths. I try to keep it clean, but when it comes down to it, I’d rather have a quiet ride home with my kids munching away than have to explain that even though french fries are delicious when they’re warm, they will have to wait because I like a clean car.

Related: Ask Rene: My Sister Is Too Competitive! I’m Sick Of It!

4. I  regret competing with other parents. I can’t make my kids’ lunches as cute as yours. I can’t convert my child’s old crib into a desk without making it a safety hazard. I do my very best. I write a daily joke on the napkin in my 9 year old’s lunch box, and I draw a silly face for my twins. I want them to smile. They should already know I love them more than words can say. I praise my children when they get my sarcasm because they need to be clever, not just book smart. I give my daughter a high five for putting an older kid on the ground in her karate class. I don’t braid hair. I don’t make dresses. I do what I do, and that’s fine. I shouldn’t have to compete with other mothers, because I assure you they wouldn’t be able to compete with me in some instances-like having a witty remark readily available when my mother-in-law suggests my children’s towels should be toasty warm upon their exit from the bath. They wouldn’t stand a chance against me during a stare down. I can snap my children back into reality with just one look; take that, Tiger Moms.

Next year it will be different. How about you? What changes in parenting are you making in 2015?

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Combing the aisles at Target in search of the best deal on Cheerios, it hit Rene Syler like the stench of a dirty diaper on a hot summer’s day. Not only is perfection overrated its utterly impossible! Suddenly empowered, she figuratively donned her cape, scooped up another taco kit for dinner and Good Enough Mother was born.

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