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Ask Rene: My Husband Is Packing On The Pounds… How Can I Help?

Hi Rene,

Thanks for the great website – it’s my new favorite daily addiction!

Okay my question isn’t about kids – it’s about my husband, Tony. We’ve been married for 9 years now (we’re in our mid-thirties) and Tony is really starting to pack on the pounds.

When we married he weighed 190… but now he’s up to 260 and climbing.

I keep myself in good shape and am a keen runner and yoga fan. I nag Tony all the time about his weight but he doesn’t seem to want to change – he says he’s tired from the kids and work and doesn’t have time to exercise. Plus he eats really badly when he’s not at home.

I think he’s given up and get annoyed when friends comment on his expanding waistline….

How can I get my old Tony back?

Tracy, Oklahoma


Ask Rene:
My Husband Is Packing On The Pounds…
How Can I Help?

Hi Rene,

Thanks for the great website – it’s my new favorite daily addiction!

Okay my question isn’t about kids – it’s about my husband, Tony. We’ve been married for 9 years now (we’re in our mid-thirties) and Tony is really starting to pack on the pounds.

When we married he weighed 190… but now he’s up to 260 and climbing.

I keep myself in good shape and am a keen runner and yoga fan. I nag Tony all the time about his weight but he doesn’t seem to want to change – he says he’s tired from the kids and work and doesn’t have time to exercise. Plus he eats really badly when he’s not at home.

I think he’s given up and get annoyed when friends comment on his expanding waistline….

How can I get my old Tony back?

Tracy, Oklahoma

Hi Tracy:

This is a familiar and touchy, one. On the one hand you are concerned about Tony’s health, and you should be; gaining 70 pounds over the course of nine years puts him on the fast track toward morbid obesity if he’s not there already. But let’s be honest, it’s also unfair because you work hard to keep your shape not to mention, you probably wouldn’t mind a little of the old, sexy Tony back.

So here’s what I would suggest:

1. Handle The Health Front

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I would discuss your concerns with your general practitioner. In my case, Buff and I have the same doctor so I make sure that I schedule well visit appointments every year for both of us. That includes a physical, blood work and a face-to-face with the doctor. If follow-ups are needed I do that too, and then make sure they get written in Buff’s calendar. Yes it’s a lot of responsibility. Yes, he should do it himself. No, he does not (come on you know how some men are. They’ll wait until an arm is falling off before they think “hmm maybe I should see someone about this).

Tony is putting himself at real risk for diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure even cancer and he needs to be made aware of that. This will lead you right into the next point.

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Combing the aisles at Target in search of the best deal on Cheerios, it hit Rene Syler like the stench of a dirty diaper on a hot summer’s day. Not only is perfection overrated its utterly impossible! Suddenly empowered, she figuratively donned her cape, scooped up another taco kit for dinner and Good Enough Mother was born.

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