1614558_10203436930470780_722543112_o(Buff Parham And Rene Syler 1/26/94)

Because He Makes It Better..
Just One Of The Reasons I Married That Man


Today is my 20th wedding anniversary. Well, not just mine; it’s also my husband’s, of course.

20 years ago today we stood on a beach in the Bahamas and promised to love, honor, cherish and all that other stuff. Back then, it was easy; almost a fantasy. I mean really, how hard could it be? Ha.

Turns out, pretty damn hard.

That’s not to say that either of us is hard to live with; neither of us is particularly easy, either. And you know that, “in sickness and in health” thing? Yeah, well that’s real too and I’m not just talking physical.

Buff and I have sailed through some really great times of job and financial security. We’ve also clung to one another in times of crisis, when jobs were lost and the financial foundation seemed shaky.

Related: My Solution To Father-Son Conflict? Work It Out.. ALONE!

But through it all, the one thing we knew we could rely on was each other.

You know, I wanted to write a big, long piece about him, about our marriage like I have the last several years.

Related: The Story Of Us.. Happy Anniversary Buff! (17th Wedding Anniversary)

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Related: What’s Love Got To Do With It? 19 Lessons In 19 Years Of Marriage (19th Wedding Anniversary)

Sadly, life doesn’t always go as we planned.

In fact, I am spending this special wedding anniversary 3,000 miles away from home, filming another TV show.

Even though we’re not together, we spoke this morning and the conversation reminded me of one of the many reasons, one of the most important reasons, I married this man;

He makes it better.


End of discussion.

Buff Parham knows exactly what to say when I’m sad.

When I’m lonely.

When I’m hurting.

He also knows when I need to be kicked in the rear instead of coddled.

In every difficult situation I’ve been in over the past two decades, along with my internal guidance, there’s been one voice that rose above the din of all others. The one that made the most sense, the one that truly had my best interest at heart, the one that told an ugly truth instead of a beautiful lie.

Buff Parham.

So to my husband of 20 years (20 YEARS!) thank you for the incredible ride. The kids, the chaos, the peace, the joy of knowing that even if the rest of the world is against me, there is one person constantly in my corner.

I love you.

And thanks.. for making it better.


IMG_3601Rene, Buff and the offspring, summer 2013