My Wife Gave Her Brother
Money Without Telling Me!
My wife gave some money to her brother without my knowledge or consent. If she had asked, I definitely would have said no because he is unreliable and already owes money to us and several other family members. I don’t understand why my wife feels the need to loan him money that she knows we’re never going to see again, especially since she knows how I feel about it. This isn’t about the money as much as it is about her going behind my back. How can I get her to see my point of view?
Dear Mad Max:
Houston, we have a problem and it’s more than can be fixed in a 4-paragraph answer from Good Enough Mother. You see, what your wife did was violate one of the big pillars in any relationship: trust. The question is what to do about it now and how to keep it from happening again.
TALK TO YOUR WIFE
This seems as good a place as any to start, in fact, it’s where you must begin. Ask your wife why she did what she did and explain how it made you feel. But, can I be honest? I’m a little worried that she gave her brother the money at all, especially in light of the fact that he owes money to you and other family members already. And what really concerns me is that she did it behind your back, knowing full well you would not approve. She put his needs ahead of your feelings; that’s a no-no if a marriage is to remain strong.