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Live, Love, Blend: Moms And Mums… Much Ado About Homecoming


Live, Love, Blend: Moms And Mums…
Much Ado About Homecoming

Homecoming season is upon us, and in the south that means one thing… MUMS!  Now I realize everything’s bigger in Texas, but our high school homecoming mums have gotten ridiculous.  In many cases they are bigger than the girls wearing them.  Since when did it become okay to spend hundreds of dollars on a fake flower with ribbons and sparkles?!  What on earth purpose does it serve?  And now the guys have to wear equally ridiculous garters strapped to their arms, often sporting teddy bears and glittery streamers.  I’ve never met a teenage boy who wanted to wear a teddy bear on his arm.  But they do it for homecoming.  Yes, I’m baffled.

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Last year my oldest stepson was a high school senior, so despite my somewhat obvious distaste for this overblown tradition, I made a mum for his date.  I’m not usually the craft-making sort, but I am the money-saving sort so I gave it a shot.  What do you know?  It was actually a fun project, and turned out pretty cute.  Of course I kept it conservative, especially since I’d already let everyone know my opinions on the giant mum trend.

Our boy and his date had a nice time and I breathed a sigh of relief that my homecoming duty was over… at least until our 7th grader gets to high school, right?!

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Two weeks ago I receive a text from our now college freshman informing me that he’s coming home to visit.  His girlfriend is a high school senior and, you guessed it, he wants me to make another mum.  ACK!

I have 3 major issues with this…

–       I am not a fan of this relationship

–       I did not budget time or money this week for mum-making (you already know how much I love this tradition anyway)

–       I really want this kid to embrace college life rather than driving 8 hours home for a date

What’s a step-mom to do?  Yes for a moment I did think, “Why don’t you ask your mother to make this one?”, but I know that would never happen.  Then I thought about explaining all the many reasons I think he should run fast and far from this girlfriend.  I won’t list them here (that would be tacky) but I will give you an example of what I call a red flag conversation she and I had…

Girlfriend:  “I hate my step-mom.”

Me:  “That’s too bad.  Do you see her much?”

Girlfriend:  “Not since my dad went to prison.”

Now I know this girl is not to blame for having questionable things going on in her family.  But you do see why this would be unsettling, right?! C’mon back me up here.  I do believe she needs a positive influence in her life, but it must be my momma bear instinct saying, “But does it have to be our boy”?  Anyway, I’ll continue working on this conflict within.  But for now the issue is homecoming and what to do about the MUM…

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Yes, of course I made the mum.  I made it simple and pretty, as I would for any of our children and any of their dates.  It made her smile and it was the right thing to do.

I still hope our son will move on from this relationship, but I know that it is his decision.  He’s a smart kid.  And I will remember to be a good example to her.  The things that bug me most about her are probably the traits that remind me of me at that age.  Perhaps she just needs guidance and prayer… and a homecoming mum.  That I can do.

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What would you do?

Let us know in the comments below!

andi parker

Andi Parker is a sweet but stubborn wife, and a motivated, multitasking mom of five. Kids include two “originals”, boys ages 13 & 9, and three “steps”, boys ages 18 & 14, and a 7-yr-old girl. Andi works as a TV Producer for a Christian TV Network and freelances as a Traffic Reporter for an NBC affiliate. Her heart is set on sharing victories and life experiences in order to encourage and inspire other blended family working moms… or any gal who’s ever had to juggle a man, a job, kids, friends, chores, etc. Andi blogs at
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