Life Connections: Eye On The Prize…
Head In The Clouds.
Goals are good and necessary in life. They assist us in sorting out all the noise and chaos that we are confronted with every day. Achieving a goal can be a lifelong process that some people never reach. Some are lucky enough to know what their aspiration in life is and they work hard every day to get it a little closer to achieving that vision. People like that are often described as “determined,” “go-getters,” “motivated,” and “focused.” They know what they want and go for it!
What if your dream goal was within your reach? It was so close that you could feel it, taste it, and touch it. You kept your eye on this one objective as you worked harder and harder; then you achieved it. YOU were the “focused,” “determined,” “go-getter” that everyone was talking about. YOU did it all and received accolades for your hard work. What if your dream was just that…a DREAM. It wasn’t what you really wanted in life.
Is this you? It was me. After years of working customer service jobs that did nothing for my physical or mental health. I decided that I was going to go back to school. I enrolled in a college that specialized in Behavioral Health and Psychological degrees. Going back to school was wonderful! I felt revived and excited to get up each morning. I worked hard going to class at night and working during the day. At one point I was also doing an internship while working and going to school. I ended up with pneumonia and hospitalized for fifteen days. I loved what I was doing that much! Finally, in 2009 I finished my doctoral dissertation and was awarded the degree of Doctor of Psychology or Psy.D. I was ecstatic! Now, I only needed to continue to work as a Psychological Assistant as I earned my hours toward licensure. I had already earned half of the 3000 needed and was on track to complete the final 1500.
Working with clients was a dream to me. Assisting people to achieve their dreams, work on their goals, and focus on their needs fulfilled mine. It was hard work but I was filled with joy. As I progressed through the steps toward licensure I kept me eye on the prize: a State Psychological License! The closer I got toward my goal the less joy I had in my work. I studied for the licensing exam and could not stop anxiety from rearing its ugly head each time I scheduled an appointment to take the exam. My eye was on the prize but my mind was in the clouds. My mind and body that, at one time, danced to beautifully together were now bumping into each other and creating a scene. There was no harmony in my life. When the mind, body, and life are at odds something eventually will break down. For me, it was my body.
Being diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Rheumatoid Arthritis may not sound like an occasion to celebrate but I look back on those times of pain and frustration as my rebirth days. You see I was too focused and too motivated. All I could see was the prize, but that was not what I really wanted. What I loved was working with people. The time spent coaching was the best time and it filled me up will life energy.
My real goal in life was very different from what I thought it was. I got so stuck on a title and a piece of paper that I forgot what I really wanted to spend my time doing. My body finally said STOP! I now am a Certified Professional Life Coach. There are many, many licensed psychological professionals who are talented and do wonderful work. I now work with them. My body and mind are back in sync.
It is OK to change your goal in life and it’s OK to say, “This is not my dream.” Change is natural and part of the cycle of life. If you feel that your eyes are on a prize that your heart cannot accept, stop and take a moment to reflect. Sit still and listen. Within the silence you will hear a voice. With each moment of silence and each breath you take, the voice will become louder and louder. The voice of your heart and mind (some call it the subconscious) will let you know what direction you need to take. LISTEN! The prize you seek may not be the one that is yours.