My Daughter Is Lying
About Being Abused!
My 11-year-old daughter, has consistently lied about things from an early age. Problem is, I worked more than I was home, and I never really noticed it in the early stages. It came to light when she began accusing my second husband of beating her brothers (his biological children) with a belt, throwing them and kicking them, etc. My second husband is a very passive person and, besides spanking, has never been physical with them. Her accusations came so frequently, though, that I was on a first-name basis with one of the social workers in our county!
Now, she has accused my new husband of the same thing. She told her therapist yesterday that he beats the boys with a belt consistently. I am a stay-at-home mother for the moment, and I can promise you that this does not happen! There has been one extremely, severe instance where my husband did use a belt, but it was because one of my sons broke into someone else’s home and began going through their stuff. According to my daughter’s account, though, all of the boys get hit multiple times, and it happens quite frequently.
Her lying has got to stop! My husband is active duty military, and these types of charges are dealt with exceptionally harshly, even if it comes to light that nothing is going on. She does not seem to care about the ramifications of her lies, nor does she seem to be overly concerned about how anyone but herself could be affected.
What do I do?! Her therapist has already determined that lying is part of her character, and that she does not think it is important to tell the truth nor be believed when she says something. But the therapist is required to report these types of accusations, so true or not my husband will be investigated. Please help! I don’t want her ruining her life or anyone else’s with this continued negative behavior.
Mom in Misery
Wow, I’m sorry to hear you’re in the midst of this. I can only imagine how frustrating it must be to work so hard providing a home and opportunity for your kids, only to have them turn around and figuratively poke your eye with a sharp stick. I have my own ideas as to how to handle this but this is going to take a bit more than that so I asked a friend of mine, who works as a life coach, her opinion. I’ll get to that in a moment, but first, here’s what I would do if I were you.