Monday Morning Motivation: Confusion Or Delusion? 

Happy Monday everyone! We’re off to a crazy start as we’re in the chute toward the end of the year. Repeat after me.. “Where did the time go?”

So many of my posts are borne of conversations I have with Buff and this morning is no different. We were on our way to the gym (isn’t that cute that we go and work out together? Yeah, right) and I was telling him about a friend of mine from college. This is a woman who, like me, is on the cusp of 50. She’s not had much success in her career, choosing jobs that aren’t best suited for her skill set. Her skill at picking a good mate isn’t much better; she’s been married twice (each time for less than a year) and about to marry the guy she’s currently living with.

As we were driving to the gym, Buff and I started talking how my friend keeps making the same (bad) decisions over and over again. It reminded me again of Einstein’s definition of insanity:

“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

Yep, that seems like common sense, no? Then Buff expounded on that. “Rene, see that yellow dividing  line in the road? If that line was removed, the majority of people would know they need to stay on the right side; after all that’s how it’s done in this country and has been for years. But there is a segment of the population who would drive on the other side, either as a short cut or speeding around someone because no one told them not to. It only takes one of two people like that before you realize prevailing wisdom, common sense whatever you want to call it, is not that clear to some.”

“Well she might just be confused.”

That’s when Buff, who’s been cutting to the chase since he was in grade school, broke it down:

“There comes a time in your life when that could be chalked up to confusion. But for her, that window is closed.  She’s too long in the tooth to be able to play innocent. That’s not confusion; that’s delusion.”


And he’s right. My friend wants a rewarding career where her skills will be utilized and appreciated. She also wants to be in a lasting, loving partnership. Neither of those things is going to happen though, if she doesn’t stop doing the same things, making the same mistakes. And she doesn’t need me or anyone else to tell her that; her own history is a stellar teacher.

I do want to believe that, on some level, she understands that but as Einstein so aptly pointed out, doing the same thing will garner the same results. Unless she changes her approach, her dream will remain just that; a dream.

What about you? Do you recognize the difference between confusion and delusion? Have you ever been stuck making bad decisions? How did you turn it around?

More from GEM:

Ask Rene: How Can I Reinvent Myself Without Support From Friends And Family?

Eyes Wide Open: Focusing On A Sobering Piece Of History

Good Enough Mother TV Alert! Just Say No To Pinterest Parenting!