My “Target Moment”: How I Left TV News Behind

target

My “Target Moment”:
How I Left TV News Behind

It’s funny how the most disastrous events have a way of bringing things into focus like nothing else can. Last summer, my then TV agent talked me into going for an audition to read news for a cable operation. Maybe it was the bump on my head I sustained trying to reach past the jeans and screen T-shirts to find a suit that still fit. Maybe it was the idea of working with people again. Whatever the case, I totally forgot the resolution I made to myself about never going back to TV news.

After a quick make-up touch-up, I found myself in-studio, microphone on and papers in hand, ready to go.  But not before executives came out and tried to pat those unruly curls that fit my personality to a T, into a tight, tiny Afro. So there I sat, sweating like a sinner in church, make-up melting with a perfectly round, brown helmet atop my head.

I have no qualms about saying the audition itself was a disaster.  I spent two decades in TV news and yet you’d have thought the text scrolling across the prompter was in Russian. Then of course, there was the “BREAKING NEWS!” the producer dictated into my ill-fitting earpiece, which I stammered through as best I could.

As humiliating as that was, the worst was still to come. I walked into the newsroom where the woman responsible for my ‘tryout’ met me at her office door. Before I got the point of my pump inside, she pronounced, rather loudly, “That was pretty bad wasn’t it? Wow, what happened to you? I really expected to see the woman who left the morning show. You were not her!”

In my defense, it was an unfamiliar setting and the first time in four years since I’d read off a prompter. But what I really wanted to say was “Hey lady, I have been to hell and back so many times in the last four years I have a frequent user pass!” I held my tongue and instead sat there with a shit-eating grin on my face. I was embarrassed and humiliated and quite frankly, stunned at this woman’s ability to make a 47-year-old woman with two decades of broadcast experience, feel like a 21-year-old, still wet behind the ears. When it was over I managed a weak smile, thanked her for her candor and headed out.

With shoulders hunched, I began the ten-block walk toward Grand Central thankful I’d grabbed my big, black sunglasses that morning. I met Buff for a quick bite and it is times like this I’m so damn grateful for him. We shared a salad and the tears that had been hidden behind the glasses, finally spilled over. But a funny thing happened as well. I got strong, much stronger than I had ever been, and clear on what the path for me would look like as I moved forward. In that moment I realized it’s as important to know what you DON’T want to do, as it is to know what you do want. I call it ‘The Target Moment’.

Now, please know I am not disparaging my favorite store or the hard workers who toil there. But that experience made it clear to me that I would rather work in a department store, in a job far different from the one I had trained for, rather than feel the way I felt that afternoon. That woman’s words, harsh as they were, served as rocket fuel for my resolve and I dried my tears and headed home.

I’d love to wrap this up with a neat bow, something along the lines of,  “And then I landed a talk show where executives didn’t try to pat my hair into a helmet and they let me be myself, which is who I’m most comfortable being. There was a big signing bonus and I never had to worry about my career or money again.”

Sadly that point hasn’t arrived yet. But it’s coming. I guess I should thank that woman for putting the final nail in the news coffin. That experience for me was like thrashing wheat where only the good stuff is left behind, but it’s a violent process. I promised myself that never again would I let my hair, or me, be patted into a shape we were not meant to be.

What about you, have you ever experienced your own ‘Target Moment?’ What was it and how did you move forward from it? Start sharing everyone!

(Editor’s note: This post first aired Jan 27, 2011)

Rene Syler is a wife, mother, breast cancer advocate and television personality whose burning desire to tell the truth about modern motherhood led her to create GoodEnoughMother.com. When not spending time with her family or burning something for dinner, Rene travels the country as host of Sweet Retreats on The Live Well Network and Exhale on Aspire.

48 Comments

  1. judycoco

    January 27, 2011 at 4:39 pm

    Renee – I just found this website. I just want to sat that you were outstanding on that morning news show and when you left, they lost me forever. i understand your point, but you would be great doing news again if you wanted do. it was their loss anyway. glad to find this site…

  2. The Broke Socialite

    January 27, 2011 at 4:41 pm

    Yes. Last April 14. My very last day in corporate America. My arch nemesis talked down to me for THE very last time. I was positioning myself for an exit a mere 6 months later but I knew that staying one more day would cause me to slit my wrists. I called Mr TBS and we agreed that I should resign. Immediately. It’s the best thing that ever happened to me.

  3. america

    January 27, 2011 at 5:06 pm

    WOW LADIES…I had a moment like this with school The Art Insitution of Washington. My experiance wasnt as bad as yours GEMS but it made me realize THIS AINT IT…THIS IS NOT THE PLACE FOR ME. I felt like one of the charaters from A CHORUS LINE she sang the song NOTHING well that was me. I had professors telling me that school was more important than MY GOOD GOVERMENT JOB…WHAT I HAVE CATS TO FEED! They said a few other things that I also wasnt feeling and being the lazy procrastornator that I am. I called my Voc Rehab counslor the next day and returned their equipment and left that organization.

  4. Roberta Lasky

    January 27, 2011 at 5:12 pm

    I once worked at a magazine. I had 6 months to go to qualify for their pension plan. The ad sales manager was just so demanding. I always reached my sales goals, actually exceeding them and she always pushed for more revenue. I left and brought new sales into my new publication. Lesson here: Don’t push me too close to the edge…you will be the loser.

  5. Candice

    January 27, 2011 at 5:37 pm

    I totally understand where you’re coming from. I’m a print journalist/editor. I started my career as a newspaper reporter. Did it for several years with no time for family. It was while I was sitting in the newsroom in the dark on Christmas night because I was WORKING and everyone else was off with family. My own family was out of town and I had been denied vacation time during the holidays. It was then that I realized that I would never work in the newspaper industry again.

    I actually took a job outside my field in a call center where nearly everyday my coworkers told me I didn’t belong there. I was much more than that. I didn’t share with anyone what my background was, but it was just on me I guess. But I took that job because I needed the freedom.

    Well I finally left there, prayed about my next move. I wanted to get back into my industry, but not in the capacity of a news reporter. And then God hit me with a whammy – go corporate. I’ve been in the corporate arena as an Editor for nearly 4 years now. And I LOVE it!!

    I get to do what I love to do, what I’m gifted by God to do AND be off on weekends, take my vacation when I want and enjoy time with my family. It just doesn’t get any better than that.

    Even today, I was able to take a vacation day to attend my son’s class field trip. Now had I been working as a news reporter and requested this day off months in advance, I would have been denied with not sympathy or concern whatsoever!!

    Anyway, I know you’re going to find that outlet that allows you to get back in the market on your terms!!

    Your posts are always so inspiring to me and so many others. And I thank you for being so transparent and giving of who you are. God bless you!!

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  7. Joss

    January 27, 2011 at 5:41 pm

    I’m there right now. If there is map, I would like it right now. I have a plan and a goal but money is stopping me it seems =(

  8. Bennett

    January 27, 2011 at 5:49 pm

    I needed to read this today. Thank you for bringing things back into focus for me.

  9. Rene Syler

    January 27, 2011 at 5:57 pm

    Wait, Bennett, you either “worked as a hooker” or had an Afro, which was it? :) You’re a new dad, you don’t need to be back in a place where you work so many hours, come home to see your kids but you’re so tired you can’t do anything, and at the end of the day, after all that sacrifice, they’ll fire you anyway.

  10. Gayle Mahoney

    January 27, 2011 at 6:19 pm

    Don’t let go of that dream Rene, or the rest of you, either: at age 45 I finally have a job where I am engaged, appreciated and the people I work with totally get me! Sometimes we have no choice to take “jobs” in order to pay the bills, especially in this economy, but I do believe that if we keep looking and keep our hearts open eventually we will all land where we belong. Just remember to be true to yourself along the way, no matter what!

  11. Rae S.

    January 27, 2011 at 6:57 pm

    OMG, Rene this is such great writing and oh so very funny. Funny as in the one liners (do know they may be repeated by me). Ie…” working with people again”, “hooker on nickel nite”, “shit- eating face grin” and the many others.

    But, seriously thanks for sharing your “Target” Moment. Glad you had it. Now go at it and contine to do you. Everybody deserves to live for who they truly are.

    Lastly, I guess my “Target Moment” was when I worked for a 5 star Catering and Event Design Company. It was the day that the Executive Chef / Owner who was Greek, called me into his office and proceeded to yell and scream at me about my “piss poor” menu planning skills. He had me in tears and I screamed back *insert four letter words*, gave hin my nicely manicured middle finger and told hom to stick his menus up his a$$. That was my last day, needless to say.

    Now I am back into medical sales (pays a lot better and a little less, just a little less bu**sh*tt Ha!

  12. Eliska Counce

    January 27, 2011 at 7:06 pm

    I had a bit of a Target moment today, but it happened in a very different slant than in career. Some people I have known and called friends for fifteen years read a blog I had written and surmised it was making fun of them. Instead of confronting me assertively, the husband called me a bitch in an anonymous comment along with some other choice words. I’ve given so much to these people over the year, I found it shocking they handled their concerns in such a classless manner (he later confirmed it was him and continued to rip me). And it’s given me permission to insist on quality people to spend my time and energy on. That just because people have been around a long time, you really need to find your TARGET friends who are healthy and quit dealing with emotional vampires.

  13. Jen (ImoBlog)

    January 27, 2011 at 9:01 pm

    You have reached more goals than the average person ever DREAMS of. I am 100% confident that you will reach many more before you ‘retire.” I am excited to watch your journey and see what amazing things unfold.

  14. Cody Williams

    January 27, 2011 at 9:23 pm

    Interesting piece. Don’t know how you folks in front of the camera deal with that nonsense.

    My ‘Target Moment’ came when I told myself that I will do what pleases me and will never worry about the acceptance of others. In pleasing me first, if others like what I do then they we seek me out for what I have to offer.

    Write Rene. Write. Does the Universe have to club you in the head, again?

  15. Will Jones

    January 27, 2011 at 10:09 pm

    Rene,
    I love this! Another wonderful truth, beautifully written as usual.
    I was at that same spot last year. I had a job that I hated for 14 years. I worked for a major railroad, and I won’t say their name, but their initials are CSX. The pay was quite good, but I didn’t like the job from day one. The longer I worked there, the more I disliked it. After a while, I hated it. And pretty soon, I started to hate myself for staying there. The work started to take me away from my family, my friends, my hobbies, my wife, and finally, I felt like even my mind was slipping at times. There was never a good time to quit, and there was always another reason to stay. My son was born, then my daughter (can’t quit now).We bought a house (Can’t quit now )… a new car… another car… and on and on. Everyone kept saying, “Man, you’d have to be crazy to leave that job!” and they were absolutely right. One day, when I was crazy enough, I walked away. I just couldn’t do it another day… so I didn’t. Ever.
    Things were scary at first. What would my friends and family say? How would I pay my bills?
    I’d done that work for so long, I didn’t know if I could do anything else, and because I’d let that job run me into the ground, it was hard to remember the days that I felt like I could do anything. But once I’d REALLY put that place behind me, that old feeling started coming back! The old ME started coming back. The ME that got on a plane right out of high school and left everything he’d ever known behind. The ME that slept in the mud and repelled down towers and never let fear stop him from doing anything! And, as scared as I was, I was excited about my future for the first time in forever! Instead of just earning a living, I felt like I was actually living!
    I have a new, better, job that I really like, but I don’t plan on staying there either. And now that I KNOW that I can leave when and if I want to, I never feel stuck. And I’m reaching for my dreams again! 
    I don’t know if you’ve ever read it, but the book “Who Moved my Cheese” REALLY helped. I’d read it years before, but once I left that job, I started to feel just like those little mice! LOL. It’s really a must read for anyone who feels like I felt; stuck on the side of a cliff, feeling like you’re about to fall, but too scared to say, “to hell with it” and jump!
    I’m proud of you for jumping. The current can get a little rough, but doesn’t the water feel great?

  16. de

    January 28, 2011 at 4:05 am

    “and then I landed a talk show where executives didn’t try to pat my hair into a helmet and they let me be myself, which is who I’m most comfortable being. There was a big signing bonus and I never had to worry about my career or money again AND she lived nappily ever after.” (smile)

  17. dianthe

    January 28, 2011 at 4:59 am

    my Target moment was roughly 8 years ago – i was working at a bank under the world’s worst manager – she broke compliance rules on a daily basis and expected us to do the same – after 6 months of her stabbing me in the back while i worked in a position i was completely overqualified for, she fired me – i was devastated at first because i had no idea how i was going to pay my bills – a few months later, i was working for Kidd Kraddick in the Morning which COMPLETELY changed my life

    even though i don’t work for Kidd anymore, i know i will NEVER go back to corporate America – specifically finance – that 6 month nightmare showed me what i should have known all along and if i hadn’t worked for KKITM, i literally would not be where i am today – married, kids, wedding planner, blogger, (wanna be) writer …

    i’m a firm believer in “everything happens for a reason”, even when we don’t know what the reasons are!

  18. Kurt David Hogan

    January 28, 2011 at 9:28 am

    Rene, I felt that after my very first TV News gig. The thing is, after returning to school (after being away so long) to study journalism made me feel I needed to soldier on as to have not wasted so much time and money.
    So five stations later I finally said “Hey, what am I doing forcing this round peg into a square hole?”

    Just because you may know how to do something, and even be good at it, does not necessarily a calling make!

    So like you, I’ve taken my many years of experience and am forging out on my own to create my own round hole that fits me to a T.

  19. Sara

    January 28, 2011 at 10:47 am

    Rene-
    The more I hear what people “in the business” have to say about TV news gigs, the more I am starting to realize that a passion for media has more than one outlet. I anchor a local online news segment, but I love the atmosphere, its small enough to make my own rules, just how I like it! I’ve always pictured my self eventually landing that big anchoring gig, but back when I started dreaming this up there were few avenues to take. My vision of where I see myself in a few years has changed dramatically in the past few months. I’m making it up as I go along, and its somehow coming together by making connections and creating new opportunities.

    It seems like you have found your niche within the market as a spokesperson for a company that sees the value in who you are! Its all about staying true to yourself, when you’re comfortable in that, your inner confidence shines through, and that’s what leads to success.

    Love the blog btw!
    Sara

  20. Nikki Newman

    January 28, 2011 at 2:55 pm

    LOVE it. I’ll have to get back to you on my own ‘target moment’, definitely had one (or more!) feel like I’m in the process of one right now…maybe that’s why I can’t answer it for now! Great piece, bang on where I’m at :-) ps well done on maintaining the shit-eating grin (sorry, LOL) I’ll definitely hold that image and think those words anytime I’m facing anything remotely as hideous! I mean, really well done on holding it together! x

  21. Peggy Phillip

    January 30, 2011 at 9:31 am

    Rene…your journey continues to inspire. Thank you for sharing this and I can assure you, I’m getting reallyclose to my Target moment. Thank you, my friend.

  22. Jaye Xn

    January 31, 2011 at 6:52 pm

    From the name of my blog, The Recovering Attorney, you can see that I had my “Target Moment,” lived through it and went on to blog about it!

    After seven years of higher education, two law licenses under my belt, major wins and successes in my solo practice, I woke up one morning and said that if I have to listen to and attempt to solve another stranger’s problem, I will tear my hair out! So I quit. There was no obnoxious senior partner or cutthroat junior associate nipping at my “well worn Ferragamos (I am a woman of a certain age).” I was just done. I am now working full time as a mom; I just started my blog this month! As for tearing my hair out. Well not exactly, however, I did Big Chop in September!!!

  23. J

    January 31, 2011 at 7:29 pm

    Beautifully written Rene’!

  24. Danielle

    February 4, 2011 at 10:14 am

    My moment came one day when I was working at a law firm and the guy who hired me made me sign up for and attend a graphic design class when I told him in the interview that I had no interest in learning graphic design! I’d taken a pay cut to take the job because I was excited to get into legal marketing and was feeling overlooked for a promotion at my old job (which I loved). The next day I told my husband I was quitting in the summer and I didn’t care if I’d have to sell shoes. My old boss called me the next week and offered me a position as his #2. For another 30k over my old salary I gladly accepted and told the lawyers goodbye! True story!

  25. Sylvia

    February 4, 2011 at 11:58 am

    Oh Rene, i’m so ignited after reading these stories. I so am about to have another TARGET moment. I’m currently about to snap at my present job. I worked on a job for 18yrs and towards the end , I HATED it and was about to HATE everyone there. I have no regrets for leaving and I promised myself that I will never work again at a place that drives me crazy! If it means going from job to job until i’m old and gray, then so be it!

  26. Dorothy Handelman

    February 20, 2011 at 9:32 pm

    Rene,
    I am so happy to have discovered your wonderful blog. Years ago both of us had children doing gymnastics and we sometimes chatted while we were waiting. I thought you were a wonderful mother and it was treat to meet you however briefly! I’ve been blogging myself about mothering teens and there’s a lot of material there!
    Wishing you continued success with Good Enough Mother and I’d be thrilled if you would check at http://curbappealinsleepyhollow.blogspot.com/
    all best,
    Dorothy H.

  27. Gay Wakefield

    March 30, 2011 at 8:52 am

    Amen, and AMEN! But “Target Moment” to me is the moment when I realize which of the targets circulating in front of me are the ones worth shooting for … and knowing that new targets I had not imagined will appear in the rotation, if I keep my eyes open for them. We never can afford to compromise who we are and what we believe in.

  28. Auntie Lisa

    March 30, 2011 at 3:26 pm

    Must have missed this one the first go-round. My Target moment was when FINALLY I found a swimsuit that had all the qualities I wanted… such as being reasonably stylish, yet modest and without making me look fat or matronly… straps that don’t slide off when you’re actually trying to swim… affordable… etc.

    Yup, it was at Target! :-)

  29. Todra Payne

    April 14, 2011 at 7:34 am

    LOVE this post and love your writing. I just discovered your website through Twitter this morning. I, too, am a natural haired girl and quite proud of it. I’ve also had my Target moments surrounding career. Let’s just say I know I never want to work for someone else again. I love owning my own beauty site and having the freedom to decide how I spend my days. And how I wear my hair! I’ll be reading here often. Thanks for being so candid. I love it.

  30. PiecesOfEight

    May 1, 2011 at 8:49 am

    Well, Rene TV News is too fake for YOU.

    You are a genuine real person, with not a fake bone in your body.

    The day AP sent out that memo to all AP reporters saying to, “Push the Anna Nicole story, ignore the other news, just push Anna Nicole” was the day I caught on to the fakeness of the news…

    Then Maria Shriver quit cause they wanted her to push the tabloidy crap and she saw the writing on the wall…

    Even the President sees whats going on..

    So you are in great company.

  31. Rene Syler

    May 1, 2011 at 10:46 am

    @PiecesOfEight: thanks! I wish I could say this transition has been easy, of course, it hasn’t been. But I remind myself I have a voice, worth and will succeed at this or die tryin’. Can’t think of a better way to go :). Thanks for always supporting me!

  32. Alton Weekes

    May 6, 2011 at 10:36 am

    All the stories are inspiring! Happy Mother’s Day

  33. Naturally Girlie

    May 13, 2011 at 9:19 am

    “I promised myself that never again would I let my hair, or me, be patted into a shape we were not meant to be.” Good for you. That about sums it up for me, too.

  34. Billie Mah

    May 29, 2011 at 10:52 pm

    I just read this article, I don’t have the time to read everything posted up on this site, but I can’t believe you went through this last summer. Thats a harsh comment from what the woman said to you. She seemed to have high expectations from having watched you on CBS morning news, and was expecting that Rene Syler from 4 years ago. You’ve gone through changes as a person these last few years, and you haven’t done TV news since after CBS. I’m glad to hear that this bad experience only made you more stronger. Wish I had a story to share about a “Target” moment.

  35. Kesha Facen

    June 8, 2011 at 1:55 pm

    Hi Rene,

    I worked for a STL CBS affiliate news station for several years. I had interned at other stations but the CBS job was my first and only news jobs out of college. In fact, I watched you in the mornings and thought you were great.
    To address the topic at hand, I worked for the station for seven years and with very little notice was laid off in 2007. I was crushed. I cried and cried and cried because after starting off as an intern there I had worked my way up to other positions and thought I was moving up so to speak. Only to be brought down. I didn’t know what I was going to do. Well after much thought, I started blogging and developed my own news and entertainment blog. So far I have no complaints.
    As for you, I think you are a great journalist and as long as you are happy with yourself that’s all that matters.
    Like yourself I would be lying if I didn’t say it’s been a tough 3years. I miss the news industry and have no regrets but I am very happy to have my own freedom.
    Kudos to you for finding your way:)

  36. Pink Kitchen

    August 4, 2011 at 10:05 pm

    See, this is why I’d never want to be on “Chopped”!!!

    My experience was not career, but marriage. I had this experience with my ex-husband. 2 weeks after our wedding, he asked me if we could just divorce and then remarry after his teenage daughters were grown. No kidding. And it just got worse from there, until we divorced – because the kids wanted us to.

    That just about killed me at the time. But at the end of the day, it made it crystal clear what I would never put up with again. And after I battled breast cancer, I was doubly confident that life is too short for B.S.

    PS – He’s still single.

  37. Karen

    October 19, 2011 at 6:12 pm

    Left my job with a Career Traning School after 7 years. My “TARGET MOMENT” was while on a conference call, the CEO uttered that I was “clueless”. I was the same person to help turn the company around allowing the school to be able to receive Federal and State Aid for the students as no more private loans were available. Yet, I was clueless. It took me less that a week to let them know it was over. Been working for myself ever since and have NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO desire to go back to Corporate America. What’s funny I do business with them now and ohhh it feels so sweet on this side

  38. Toya | The Limerick Lane

    November 27, 2011 at 12:02 pm

    I hit my Target moment last year. I do not ever want to go back to corporate America, but now I need to figure out how to survive without it.

  39. Joyceline

    March 13, 2012 at 2:56 am

    The only new Rene wil be telling, will b about d gospel of JESUS CHRIST. OH HAPPY DAY. RENE IS GIFTED IN MANY AREAS.

  40. Nic Nac

    April 25, 2012 at 9:40 am

    This blog is right on time. My “Target moment” was nearly 2 years ago when I was fired from my boring corporate job. I took the job because I wanted an “easy” stable position so I could get married and have a baby. I wanted to reduce my stress. Ha! I found out a few months after starting the job that I had breast cancer. After losing my breast, going through chemo, and eventually losing my relationship… just as I was on the downside of treatment and ready to try to get back to life… I was fired. Supposedly my work was not up to par. Interesting considering that most of the time I was out on disability. But as I have spent the last two years blogging, writing and trying to figure out what’s next… it finally dawned on me that the hell of working in another corporate position just won’t be for me. I am now working on building a technology startup and while I hate the fact that I am just broke, the thought of having a full bank account but hating every moment that I spend awake keeps me learning how to code and designing this prototype. I had a moment of weakness this morning so I appreciate the serendipity of coming across this post today. To survive breast cancer only to kill myself slowly working for unappreciative machines is not the option I choose for my life.

  41. By Word of Mouth Musings

    August 13, 2012 at 4:18 pm

    We are WAY too worthy to be typecast with helmet hair.

  42. Martha @ MarthaWills.com

    December 30, 2012 at 10:25 am

    Rene,

    I needed to read this this morning. My life is in transition. I’m moving from stay at home married mom, to divorced singledom, needing to go back to work to provide for myself. The easy thing would be to go back to teaching. Sometimes I think I’d enjoy a classroom of children again.

    But I know if I do it I’ll never be able to focus on my writing. My dream of becoming a writer, an author; to focus on my passion will slowly cease to exist.

    And so I waver in this place of knowing what will happen to my dream versus knowing what is easy and would provide without question.

    I’m going to think about your target experience, while I ponder my decisions.

    Thanks for this piece. It resonated a lot!

  43. Rene Syler

    December 30, 2012 at 10:37 am

    THX Martha!
    Good luck to you as you work through all the changes in your life. If I could give you one piece of advice it would be to get comfortable with change and flux. That’s been the story of my life the last several years but once I sort of embraced that was the way it was going to be, it stopped being so hard. It just was.. I do hope you’ll follow us here and over on the Good Enough Mother Facebook page too. Best to you and Happy New Year!

  44. Brian Wallace

    December 31, 2012 at 12:18 am

    Very nice piece, Renee…being that you and I both have had careers in broadcasting, we all wonder when that “target moment” will come. I can say that I thought I had that moment two years ago until I had a LONG talk with a friend in Dallas who made me see that I had a “target moment” with where I worked more than the business itself. So while I continue to search to get back into the business, creating my own web/graphic design company has put me in a situation where financially I’m no where near where I was two years ago, but I haven’t been as happy and “at peace” with my since my son was born. It sounds like you’re headed that way, but when its all said and done, “FIND YOU”, then “DO YOU”…its a happiness money can’t buy!

  45. Ola

    April 21, 2013 at 5:35 pm

    First of all, I love your honesty. That is what makes you so engaging.

    When we set boundaries for ourselves we must stick with them, and not compromise. I have been in this situation where I have told myself what I would never do, and ended up backsliding only to regret it. Stay focused and know that every opportunity is not a good opportunity, and the rejection was just God’s way of reminding you to stay in the lane that he put you in. What he’s got is better, bigger and greater than what they got. Everything that looks good, isn’t good…at least not for everybody. I always tell my friends when they slide into woulda, shoulda, coulda, “God knows what you don’t know. He might have been doing you a favor.”

  46. ElleS

    August 5, 2013 at 12:23 pm

    Your words, your candor, your honesty… it’s all what I needed to read this morning. I’ve been in this dilemma since summer 2011. I’m degreed, experienced, still I cannot find the type of work I want that pays and that allows me to be myself. This article is so uplifting and inspiring. So many people, including the little voice inside of me, have been telling me that I need to create my own opportunities. Everyday I meet someone new or read something that validates the advice, and this was just the proper mallet I needed to knock me upside the head (sorta speak). I have the ideas, I just gotta push through and commit!

    Thank you so much for writing this and continued success to you, Rene!

  47. D'Ellis R. McCammon

    February 28, 2014 at 10:00 am

    It’s ALL about the “future”.

  48. Angelique

    June 26, 2014 at 11:37 am

    Thank you so much for this site Rene. My target moment came in my personal life last year, when I separated from my drug-taking partner, after ten years and two children together. It is terrifying and exciting all at once to have a life ahead of you that you never imagined. Sites like this give me strength, as do my amazing strong single mum friends.

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