How Could He Do This To Me?
My husband and I have been married for seven years. The first four were pretty good; he had a great job, we owned a home and had two kids, who I currently stay at home with. Then at the height of the recession, Jeff lost that job.
What followed was pure hell. We lost our home, had to move in with his family and ran through out entire savings.
About six months ago, Jeff got a better-paying job and we began to slowly rebuild our financial life. Then things got even better; Jeff was offered a promotion and a 40,000 a year raise!
And then he turned it down.
My husband is so unhappy in the environment where he works. He says it’s sucking the life out of him; he put on weight and dealt with a blood pressure problem this year. He says he also wants to do something more creative. But him not taking the better job (salary) means we’re still stuck in this crappy apartment, clipping coupons and praying for life to get better.
Rene I’m so angry I don’t know what to do. What kind of man who’s caring for his family does that? Doesn’t he remember how bad it was for so long? I’m very worried because my anger with him has not only not gone away, it’s gotten worse and I fear his decision is going to tear our marriage apart.
Disappointed and hurt
Dear Disappointed and hurt:
I understand you are hurting. I understand you are scared. What I am having a hard time with is, and forgive me, I don’t mean to pile on, is your attitude. This letter makes you sound a bit selfish. It might be time for a little soul-searching on your part. So here’s what I’m thinking and what I would do if I were you.