I know the answer to his one is probably “Butt out,” but hear me out.
My sister-in-law and I get along fine. We do not raise our children the same way — I tend to pick my battles, whereas she has LOTS of battles – but her kids seem relatively happy so I just keep my mouth shut.
This recent one takes the cake, though. She posted on Facebook that she had just gotten done reading physics for two hours. Then she said something about all the younger children and their homework, and I realized this was for her COLLEGE SOPHOMORE.
I know kids need help with their homework and sometimes that means parents read up on subjects they’re not familiar with or have long ago forgotten. Sometime around high school, though, I started nudging my kids away from mom and dad, and toward their teachers or in-school tutors for help. I figured they’d be off at college soon enough and needed to learn other ways to seek out assistance.
Clearly my sister-in-law, whose oldest son lives at home and commutes to school, doesn’t share this sentiment. It’s not like she’s suffocating my nephew … yet. Is there any way to approach this? My kids are close to him and could find out if it even bothers him. But shouldn’t it?
Do I just MYOB? Or can I at least tease him about his mother doing his homework and hope he bristles enough to ask her to step off a bit? Why do I care?
Different Moms, Different Styles
Well, you’re certainly on the money with what I was going to say (you must be a regular reader). On the surface the issue is about your sister-in law and her need to be overinvolved in her kids’ lives. But honestly the most striking part of your letter is this:
Okay here’s the situation (how I see it) and what you can do about it.