Hi Rene, I am at a loss (again). My daughter has had a couple of boyfriends (mainly just hanging out at the house) and she can be quite a pill. She gets good grades and has lots of friends but just seems to be ‘mean’ sometimes, well, mainly to me. Her friends have noticed it and even said things to her about it. I can’t even ask a simple question without getting smarted off to or yelled at. This morning, it escalated into almost fighting and name-calling. I have another 16-year-old daughter who is very poised, though nearly as outgoing. We’ve raised them the same which is why I’m confused. I can see how her meaness and teasing sometimes gets old with her friends and boyfriends. I am afraid in this one, it’s going to come back to haunt her and I guess I just try to help too much. On the outside, our family comes across as the perfect family, honestly…almost Beaver Cleaver-ish. But, behind closed doors, we are as dysfunctional as anyone.
Please Rene, what should I do with this kid?
Signed, Miserable Mom
Dear Miserable Mom:
Ahhhh yes, the teen years; loads of fun, right? I’m not saying all the years are this way (neither are all teens) but even just a couple of days of snotty behavior is more than enough. I feel fortunate in saying that when my kids set sail on the USS Adolecense, they have been relatively short trips and they return to dry land (and their senses) pretty quickly. I have a couple of ideas on this and they are things that I have tried when either Casey or Cole act out so here’s what I would do if I were you..