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I’m not embarrassed to admit that sometimes it gets tough. I’m not one of those people who talks about how rosy it is all the time, intoxicated by the fumes of their own BS (yeah, we all know those types). No, I’m more of a truth-telling pragmatist, maybe a little too much, as pragmatism can sometimes veer off into pessimism. So the other day, just getting overwhelmed with all of the things I had to write and places I had to be, I found this letter in my Facebook inbox. Wow, this note from a woman I had emailed a few times and met once, reassured me that I was, no, AM, on the right track. So is she and I am humbled by the fact that she points to me as a part of her process. She said I could share this note with you so here it is. And Anonymous, Thanks….
I wrote to you earlier this year because I had been following your “Ask Rene” column and have always respected the straight-to-the-point but very wise advice that you give. I had supportive people around me, but I wanted an objective opinion about my situation. My decision had been made, but I was questioning myself. My self-esteem was pretty much non-existent. It turns out that your input was crucial. You gave me advice, but you didn’t just stop there.
When I wrote to you, I had already made the decision to leave my husband of almost 25 years. I was questioning the practicality of leaving with the economy the way it is and the fact that I haven’t worked full-time outside of the home in over 20 years. I spent my time taking care of my several children and my husband.
After I gave you the back-story, you called my relationship for what it was — an abusive marriage— and then you began to build me up. I remember being impressed that you took the time to look over the content on my Facebook page, including my pictures, and you saw my value. You told me that I WOULD find a job. You told me that I deserved to take care of myself. You encouraged me in a way that the people close to me couldn’t. The fact that you took the time to help me, a stranger, was instrumental in getting me back on track.
Soooo much has happened since then. I moved in with family and found a part time job over the summer. When that job ended I started looking for work again. There have been many ups and downs since, but today, I want to share my excitement with you.
I started my PERFECT job this week. On my first day, the boss hinted that his plan was to keep me after the holidays. (I’m seasonal and part time right now.) During my third shift today, he told me that he is grooming me for management. I LOVE the job so much that I accidentally worked 20 minutes past my quitting time yesterday. It’s so nice to be appreciated and recognized.
I’m seeing a counselor and that is going well too. I’m facing the voices in my head that tell me I’m not good enough and the ones that cause me to give up or not even try out of fear of failing. I didn’t realize that they were even there and that they had been holding me back all these years.
Thank you for seeing me even when I didn’t see myself. Don’t EVER doubt that you are doing a GREAT work with Goodenoughmother.com! I’m inspired by you and I know that countless others are also.
With Much Love and Appreciation for you…